Monday 25 January 2010

there is nothing to see here; and the nothing gazes right back at us


So I finally managed to get started on this piece of crap design coursework. Needless to say, whilst I do not regret the considerable amount of time I spent procrastinating, I do both rue and lament it. Because with every little bit I've done, it's thrown up another two or three unanticipated bits that need doing, and I am now desperately close to running out of time on this thing.

However, in my current inebriated state I figure I'm incapable of doing any sort of decent CAD work; so I'm going to talk about cars instead.

A little over a week ago, on our regular nerdhammer evening, the conversation got around to the "ultimate ten car garage"; money/scarcity being no object, what ten vehicles do you most desire?

Whilst not entirely predictable, there were a few choices that were far from surprising; Sam went for some kind of steam plough, the RoboJew opted for an Imperator Titan (a kind of cathedral city on legs, but with more plasma annihilators and guns in the knees), and Matt wanted a Sherman tank. We were initially surprised that he didn't go for a Tiger; but a Sherman will probably still work fine on the Polish roads, and it's easier to get parts.

Here's the current run down of my ever-evolving ten, in no particular order.

  • Lotus Exige.
I like the Lotus ethos of making fast cars; keep it simple, keep it light.

  • Ferrari F40.
Well, it's not a proper top ten without a supercar of some description, is it? I used have a poster of one of these on my wall when I was a kid. It's ridiculous, and I love it love it love it.

  • Bastard Mini.
I'm not that much of a sucker for classic cars, but I've always liked the old "proper" minis. And if you then dropped a Honda VTEC lump in it...

  • Mk2 Honda CRX.
I like rubbish Japanese cars, okay?

  • Nissan 300ZX twinturbo.
See above.

  • Dodge Charger.
I figure that any top ten garage has to have at least one American muscle car; and this is the one the baddies in Bullitt drove into - or at least, vaguely in the direction of - a petrol station. Therefore it rules.

  • Bowler Wildcat.
It can do a bazillion mph on any kind of terrain, and seems like the sort of car that you're supposed to crash. Perfect.

  • Some Sort Of Big Rig Like The One Jack Burton Had In Big Trouble In Little China.
Like, a Kenworth or something? I don't really know anything about trucks. But I have a tiny penis, and therefore need a really big wagon. With really big exhausts.

  • Caterham R500.
Light and fast like the Exige, but Caterhams generally come as kit cars; so I could have all kinds of fun putting together my very own horrendous deathtrap.

  • Nissan Skyline R34.
Did I mention that I liked rubbish Japanese cars? This slot could just as easily have been filled by an old mk3 Toyota Supra, a Nissan Pulsar, a Mazda RX7, a Mitsubishi GTO, a Toyota Starlet Turbo...

...or maybe even my old Rover 216GTi.



Shut up Matt.

1 comment:

Will Foxton said...

I am laughing in Afghanistan, at this amusing car collection, and the suggestions from the mecha-kike and friendly neighbourhood stormtrooper.

This may be against the law, as I think BBC editorial policy expects us all to hold candles and weep at all times.

I have to say, MRAPs we're riding around in out are the shizzle when it comes to cars.